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Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Pretty Much Sums Things Up

David My Grand Dog 
sums it up pretty well for me
these days.


He often rests like this 
in his back yard
in complete surrender.

I refuse to surrender but I am 
very tired of fighting the good fight.

Knowing it will take me twice as long to decorate
this year due to my limitations;
and knowing it's a special holiday with
my brother and SiL coming for first time and also both
significant others coming with kids, I've decided
to start in about a week. 
Will try to remember to show the projects
as they happen.

But first it is yard work.
The guy who helped me last Spring is unavailable
so it's me doing it in 20 minute spurts.
We've past the year mark since the saga
began and I find no cause to celebrate
that damn milestone. 

I think mentally I'm also bogged down in concern
for our country and the state of the world
in general. I remind myself of my grandparents living
through World Wars and ponder how that generation
persevered with far more dignity than we 
are showing. 

Of course the c-pap story continues 
to unfold. I made it 5 1/2 hours last night
with 3 breaks coughing myself awake,
but they still sent me an 
email congratulations badge this morning.
(they monitor me)
This is what adults need today?
Social media has created needy little buggers
needing constant affirmation.

I don't require congratulations.
I need Drs who can figure out what the hell
is wrong and fix it.

Ok I'm not bleah, I'm bitchy.


Constance said...

I understand, I'm not upset that I have gotten old but as my mother told me one morning some years ago "I don't mind looking old or being old I just wish I didn't feel so damn old". The day I turned 50 I could everything I could do at 25 but by the time I turned 55 it started going down hill much faster than I thought it would. Dr's treat me like I'm some sort of old outdated used machine that doesn't need to be fixed he just needs to keep the motor as quiet as possible until it croaks completely. I still love life and all of the things I've done and loved before, I am sick of people getting this attitude that you can just sell everything and go into a home. I have a home and I'm going to hang in here and love it and make the most of it and never give up and if you need to speak up then please do so. I admire that you keep going and people need to know that elderly people have a lot to offer. You keep fighting and bitch when you need to, I think there are a good many that may need a good dressing down when it comes to us seniors.

Take care

Karen said...

IT's ok to be bitchy now and then! ... you have good reason. Take it slow, don't overdo things.

donna baker said...

I feel it too Suzan. Small breaks are the way to go. I started yesterday cutting down a hibiscus shrub while bending down. Cut the new fish pond pump cord in half then stood up and ouch. The back had gone out. So, I've spent the last 2 nights nearly awake (in pain) and am worthless to say the least. I still don't know what we are doing for Thanksgiving though I feel too old to be standing and cooking for two days. We'll see.

oldgreymareprimitives said...

Thank you Constance, Karen and Donna- It's nice to know there are women out there going through the same things. We keep each other going some days right? I managed over 2 hours in the yard and filled two 38 gallon bags. That took care of about 10 feet of wall. Back at it tomorrow- my goal is 2 bags a day until done

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Oh Z the c-pap thing sounds awful. I hope it helps but I'm with you they need to figure this out so you can feel better. I also have to do things in little spurts, then rest. Thank goodness I don't have yard work to do but I do need to do some cleaning up of old planters and cute things that are no longer cute in my yard, My kids and whole family will be here for Thanksgiving so I'm going to work really hard (in spurts) to get my home cleaned up and fixed up. Then I can relax for Christmas! It's ok to to be bitchy I think it's my go too mood these days!

Kit said...

I hear ya. My old bones are complaining. Your house always looks great, so don't do too much. Thanks for your thoughts on my kitty. :) Take care friend. Kit