Thursday, June 22, 2017

Crotch Dew

So my pal Ronda sent me 
this and thought I should add it to 
my latest post.

Good idea as I was going to revisit
the topic being remiss in 
not mentioning 
Crotch Dew
in the earlier post.

Yeah, yeah,
we all go through it
and a lot of us feel we're the only
ones aging out faster than
blue cheese.

I love my age, I do.
The only reason I would wish to be young again
is to have more flexible joints. 
I'd like not to make noise when I sit down
or stand up, no pops, or grinds or groans.

My poor mom used 
to make "other" noises as she sat and arose
 and especially when she climbed stairs.
Thomas the Tank Engine was not a thing yet
or I'm sure the nickname "toot" would have happened.

Anyway crotch dew is just 
as unpleasant as boob sweat,
or swoob as I saw in an article yesterday.
I have switched to gowns to sleep in, 
spend the day in,
garden in,
Ok drive thru Wendy's last night in.
(I throw a shirt over top and it's a block away)

Crotch Dew is averted with  
soft sleeveless cotton gowns.
I got 4 this summer at Kohls.
50% off with addtl 30%


There is a reason that the ads for 
Poise and Always and such
are so much more prolific than before.
Baby Boomers are united in many, many ways.
Leaking, sweating and dewiness are just a few.

Laugh about it, talk about it.
We're all blue cheese.


Tuesday, June 20, 2017



(  (

I have always envied woman with 
small breasts. I believe that they
look better in clothes ( so does the entire
modeling empire) they can jog without harnessing,
after breast feeding, many do not then 
resemble tube socks with a tennis ball in the bottom.
They don't have an "under" ledge to them per se.

Yeah, yeah men like boobs.
So what, I say.

Right now at 113 degrees, even with my air conditioner 
in competition with every other one in the city,
and waiting for the afternoon brown out 
surely to come...

I have sweat.
BOOB sweat
 that then runs down 
where gravity takes it 

They predict 110 -116 at least,
they say at least
for the next 7 days.

I cannot afford a high summer power bill so I keep 
the thermostat set at 80, it still runs constantly,
and run fans directly in front of me,
or behind me, depending on the room,
and whether I am vertical or horizontal.
Even so my Energy snapshot shows I'm over 
$200 with 15 days yet to go.

If even one of you says 
"But it's a dry heat", 
I'll have to throw Howie in the car
and head your way to live with you for the summer.
AS long as you live somewhere cool, or at least
on the ocean.

Believe me, you did not want a 
photo on this post.
There are 599,000 google
responses to sweaty breasts. Go there.

(  (

Thursday, June 15, 2017

CA Road Trip

Howie and I headed to CA on Saturday 
to see the kiddos and help with a few projects.
  It was a perfect couple of days 
filled with planting, yard work, great dinners and 
lots of talk and laughter.

Ben had been thinking of an herb garden for his porch,
so we found a good set up at Lowes and viola!
Hannah has a small dirt area out her back door
 perfect for a patio and garden, so we spent a day,
 clearing and cleaning off the ivy wall 
and Hannah pulled out about 10 lawn bags of debris.
Then Tom and Hannah went back to the store for pavers
and Tom began laying 54 of them perfectly level. 
Ben and I watched while Ben also cooked and 
I organized some cupboards. 

David and Howie were helping?
Hannah has promised pictures upon completion.
I also repotted and potted new plants for a lovely little corner.
Industrial lights will be strung and it will be a cozy retreat.

THEN there was THIS...
One of the most delicious meals ever.
Roasted Potatoes.
Horrible photo, just trust me.
Prepared by our favorite cook Ben.
He uses a sous vide first for hours 
and then the magic of his 
seasonings and skill.
We made yummy noises throughout the dinner.
We raved so much that Ben said he now 
doubted our sincerity. 

These three are so incredible. 
I adore them and miss them.
My last night they took me to the cutest 
Irish bar up the street.
I have declared it my bar.
The vibe and fish and chips were perfect.
I can't wait to go back.

I am blessed and never take it for granted.