Tuesday, October 12, 2010

"Fasten Your Seat Belts,"

"it's going to be a bumpy night."
Margo Channing.


It is one of the very first things we are taught alongside our ABC's.
Counting is important.

How many children did we leave the house with?
We should return with the same.

How many portions of cheesecake did we consume last evening? (two)

How many weeks of pay will it take to buy that delicious handbag?

Counting is important.

But it is bugging the heck out of me lately, so here comes the rant.
Turn away HERE if you are not in the mood, and
please remember I am an advocate for the positives we can achieve.

I have participated in several conversations and read posts recently
concerning topics on perception of value of self and specifically blogs.
That convoluted sentence means:
Why am I not as popular as ____ ?
How do I get more Followers?
I comment on hers why doesn't she comment on mine?

Now I've read the how-to along with everyone else.
I've read how to blissfully blog.
I do not disagree with anything recommended or suggested.
I do believe there are some etiquette rules that
ought to be followed, but some have become a negative nuisance,
which have caused angst and sadness.

The one disclaimer here is this:
Many blogs are a feeder source to an on line business and or
commercial enterprise. Of course these individuals do and should
increase and seduce Followers and self promote to increase sales.
That is NOT what I'm referring to.

Here's where my concern, no, my dismay arises.
Half way through my first year of blogging I too was in the race for
Followers, counted every comment and worried if some posts had
less than prior ones. Admit it, you did/do too.

I felt the pressure, and I mean pressure to answer every comment
with a comment to their blog and follow everyone who followed me.
The equivalent of a thank you note for a thank you note.
Now before you start thinking bad thoughts
about me, let me finish.
I LOVE to GET comments I LOVE to GIVE comments.
I also LOVE to email back to comments.
( did you notice in my 10.10.10 the suggestion to add email to your profiles?)
I detest no reply-blogger..
Let me tell you personally what I liked, why you made me laugh, or weep,
or just thank you for stopping by.

Then into about the 6th month or so I took notice of
what several of you have heard me say are "collectors".
Comment and Follower Collectors.
People who follow, invite you over and are never heard from again.
People who comment but if you don't comment back
tit for tat, "poof" they also vanish.
People who comment generically to everyone or who
obviously didn't really read your post, and make you say "huh?"

I suddenly realized that by no fault of anyone else, I had
reverted back to a Jr High Mentality of "who likes me?"
All over blog-dom I still read of newbies asking how to get
more followers, writers concerned their blogs aren't good enough.
In Junior High In PA some of us wore Villager, Ladybug and John Meyer.
Others wore Bobbie Brooks.
That immediately put you into different camps or cliques.

Over 400 followers? You must wear Villager.
Under 200? Well, you wear Bobbie Brooks.
Pardon the 60's Latrobe, PA reference but
that IS my point of reference.

Now before you think this is sour grapes since
I am not in the over 400 group by far, let me clear it up,
on the record, right here, right now.
I love when people comment on my posts.
I love to discover new blogs and follow them with NO agenda.
I am thrilled when someone finds me on their own
not via a contest and Follows me. I believe it means they
saw or read something they liked.
It makes me feel good.
Sometimes I do a Snoopy happy dance.

It no longer validates me or my blog.

If I follow you it is because you are some one special to me, and it
does not matter if you follow me back.
If I comment to you, it is because I have something I want to say,
and no, you do not have to always comment back. It's OK.
If you are not on my blog roll it does not mean
I don't follow your every post via reader,
and enjoy you very much.

Now I know there are many who still struggle with this,
who get their feelings hurt; we talk amongst ourselves
in whispers about this topic.

But let me address the elephant in the room.
Think of someone really BIG in blogdom. OK got it?
Now, If you left one of 200 comments that day would you expect
to hear back from them especially if they post daily?
Would you expect them to Follow you?
Even if they did, could you imagine them reading
a thousand posts a day of everyone they followed,
and then commenting on everyone?
YET, we do expect it from less popular bloggers as a given.
My question to the Mammoth in the parlor is:
how BIG must you be before you can break the rules
and not lose your status in popularity or hurt someone's feelings ?

We all have close blog friends that we comment to every post.
I have a dozen or so who I email with several times weekly,
sometimes daily if we have a hot topic.
That is the greatest blessing of this adventure.

My philosophy now is this, and yes, I'm nearly done:
I value, no, I treasure, the communication,
idea sharing and friendships offered through blogging.
I do my very best to be kind and follow blog etiquette to
the best of my ability, as long as my blogging remains joyous.
I will hold no one's feet to the fire if their
attitude or approach differs from mine. OK?

Meanwhile, if you have dealt with these issues,
and wish to return to the joy and happiness you had at
the beginning of blogging and which I now enjoy...

Stop counting:
Many of us have removed our Follower #'s
One of the best blogging actions for me.
If you need to know mine, go ahead and count them,
and ah, ask yourself why it matters?

Why have strong, powerful women
allowed themselves to be caught up in
the man based insecurities of whose is bigger?
We have told them for centuries
size doesn't matter. Are we lying?
Who's counting?



marcia said...

Oh Suzan, I LOVE this post! I so agree with you. There are those who are so worried about getting followers that I think they are the ones who really *lose* in the end.

I am happy to have followers in the hope that in some way I might have inspired someone, but it is not a race to me or a contest.

I have been feeling guilty lately that I haven't commented back to some of the wonderful comments I have received because I DO value the people who have taken the time to leave them and want them to know that so often they make my day! But I find myself in a bind and stretched into so many directions as it is, and only hope noone holds it against me <>.

I love what you had to say!

happy day!

Razmataz said...

Suzan, Great post. Loaded with truths. I was actually thinking of getting rid of my comments and having my email. When I first began, I cared about them and the numbers, but now I just enjoy the few people I chat to regularly. I never needed to be in the populat group. I also don't give a crap anymore if I say something "offensive" to some. I don;t like to be censored. I also descriminate what I read much more. If it is all fluff and BS, I just pass. Like my real life friends I enjoy lively and stimulation conversation.

Even if I had 1000 followers what good would it do me. I couldn't write back to them all, I certainly wouldn't know their names, and likely wouldn't have time to check most of their blogs.

Love it when you get us fired up like this.

Sue said...

Well that was interesting! When I first started blogging a little over a year ago, I was so excited that anyone read my blog or left a comment. I remember that I would check my "stats" every evening and if I had at least 10 hits, I was thrilled. Now, I rarely even look at the stats. Sometimes I have to because I've been asked to review a product and they want to know how many "unique page views" I have per month, etc.

I really like some of the people who read, follow and email me. That is what keeps me going...building relationships with wonderful people. My blog has a variety of things on it and I'm very aware that if I were to "polish it up" a bit, speak in the way my English professors suggested and made my blog more professional...I might have more followers and more success. Once in a while, I'm tempted...but I started my blog to sound conversational...to offer things that anyone can do and simply to "sound like me". I have found that people tend to show up every day and that is enough for me.

Carole said...

This is why I will follow you anywhere my friend! Boy if only I could write like you and have some B***s I would have written this myself.
Are you doing the Happy Snoopy Dance??? Now I have a visual that won't leave my head! lol

ShabbyESP said...

I just wanted to say hello!!
I enjoy your site (I am a follower) and I like your name!!!


Olive said...

I do so love the current you swim in or against! ♥O

Maureen said...

Hear, hear! (or is it Here, here?) In any case, well said!

north pal said...

wow! gracious,me oh my! i read certain blogs because i enjoy them and the heartfelt things they give out to us. i am selfish. i want to read a blog that makes me feel good. i secretly put these blogs in my pocket,because i have new friends.but......i do not add them just to have a great number in my stash. if a blogger requests prayers,i pray for them as i feel they are reaching out and need prayers from some unknown person who cares. guess i like to think i appreciate those that i have. Bestest,Denise

oldgreymare said...

North Pal,

I think that is a healthy attitude to have but since you do not have a blog ( that I know of) what I was referring to does not apply to your collection of favorite blogs. I hope you did not misunderstand what I was saying, and for that matter I hope you see this since there is no email for me to reply to either. : (

Thank you for your input.


joanne said...

Oh how I love that Betty Davis line...priceless!
Agreed, most of the time I feel like I'm in a popularity contest and wonder why I care. I guess we all like to feel validated. I enjoy having the follower list on my blog but I don't live or die by it anymore. The fact that anyone comes back always amazes me and I am grateful for the support and friendship that blogging has brought me.

Well said my friend, well said...

June said...

Z why is it you always know just what to write?! I loved this. I have been enjoying my blogging experience so much lately because I have gone back to the reason that I started the blog in the first place...to share some of the things I love. I remember a post I did in the very beginning when I outlined (more to myself than anyone who may have been reading in those early days)the reason I started the blog. I never ever gave it a thought that others would come and follow along. I would suggest to those who feel that they don't have the followers or the visits that they would like to have, to put analytics on their blog. I think they would be pleasantly surprised at how many people really are reading their posts. My daughter put it on my blog (without me even knowing)because she has my password)) and one day she called me and told me to go take a look. It was fun to see just who came by to read my posts.
The only problem I see with blogging is that I really do make wonderful connections here and have developed so many friendships that I miss it when I'm away from the computer (which has been a lot lately) and I miss them when I do not get to visit them as much.

Seriously Z...was that really your junk drawer??? I am so ashamed of myself now!LOL!
Forgive me for the typos if there are a ton, but Landon is antsy to get to bed now and he's letting me know it!!!
love you to you,

MJ said...

Hi Suzan, well, I came over here to thank you for being such a kind supporter of my blog and I find this post. So now I'm not only thanking you for your comments, I'm thanking you for writing this, too!

If you're blogging for justification, you're going to be unfulfilled in your blogging life. If you don't love the writing, the blogging itself, it doesn't matter how many "followers" you have; you will be an unhappy blogger.

I love to write. When I get a follower, I feel happy, but it doesn't change the bottom line that I love it and would still write it.

I get the same sense from you. You blog because you love doing it. So I guess what I'm saying is we're super winners. (Cut me some slack here; Ms. Coco woke us up at 5:30am and I'm not firing on all cylinders just yet...)

Unknown said...

Phew Suzan! Feel like I need to dash over, put the kettle on and hold your hand. One of the joys of being a 'woman of a certain age' is being soooo over all that high school rubbish.
I love reading what you have to say, in your posts and comments. You are always meaningful and thoughtful.

I'm with you girl, counting is for the birds.

Julie@beingRUBY said...

Hey Suzan
Not sure how I missed this post!!! I must admit i've been sort of liberated since I moved house.. with all my internet issues I've dropped out of the loop a bit.. which can be a bit of relief.. Like getting off the dizzy merry go round.. although I missed everyone when i was offline..

Yes I am one of those ppl who likes to return every comment I get... call me crazy but I try as I appreciate each comment I get and remember what it was like when I first started blogging and comment count = 0.. hahaha But every time my internet drops out of the ether... it's get harder and harder to do so..

I have to say though... returning comments is how I've met some terrific people I wouldn't have otherwise met....ie yourself... and getting comments has given me so much encouragement over this last year... Basically it got me back into art and encouraged me try my hand at photography... both these things long forgotten before I started blogging.. So.. although I agree in some respects.. it is a double edged sword ...

Interesting post.. food for thought!!... ciao xxx Julie

Jules said...

Amen Sister and now I too feel better. Thanks for ridding me of that big white elephant :)

I have so wanted to scream the exact same thing. Good job Susan :D
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Curtains in My tree said...

That was a lot of reading to do. But I read it allllllllllll.

I just read blogs because of the pretty pictures. also try to leave comments that I like the pretty pictures. I am not a store I just buy a lot of stuff then try to get rid of some of it when i get tired of it. I sell twice a year as I go through the clean out this stuff.

I love your blog the name is so cute.

I just talk on my blog about my day to day look at my stuff kind of thing.
A show & tell blog.

xoxoxoox Janice

Jillayne said...

Nailed it again. There is a real penchant with many bloggers to collect Followers and have posts Facebooked or Tweeted, all of which escapes me. Tallying Followers is meaningless; anyone can click the Follow button but it's the people that are most interested that return.
I like getting comments, but again, I don't consider the number of them as a measure of the post, rather, it's the content of the comment that tells me if what I said meant something to someone.
That's what I like the most about blogging.
And I like it best when the post was about something I think as opposed to something I have made. I have often wished I had a blog on philosophy - I haven't studied it formally, but I seem to do it everyday in my head!
Anyhow, I think as in so many other things, we are a competitive creature and it is easy to get caught up in the counting and tracking. I learnt a big lesson through "Where Bloggers Create" - the comments came fast and furious and I realized very quickly there was no way I could hope to keep up with that if I ever had a following that garnered that many comments regularly. Since then, I have been glad to have a blog that makes me happy, lets me think out loud and has introduced me to some wonderful people.

Anonymous said...

Good morning, z.

I'm just going to jump in, K?
RE: RULES - What rules? We all blog for different reasons. My blog is a combination self-journal & a way to connect with others. I blog about whatever hits me, whenever I feel like it. No rules. I have read many blogging how-to articles/posts and DISAGREE with most of it. A blog should be whatever we wish it to be. If others find us and enjoy what we share - no matter how big or small we are - then that's great. If they don't like us, that's fine too.

RE: COUNTING COMMENTS - I would rather have a couple of comments from people who "get me" and leave a thoughtful comment than have dozens of comments from people that do not. The number means nothing.

RE: RETURNING COMMENTS - I've relaxed when it comes to answering every comment with a return visit & comment. I do not return comments to blogs that scare the heck out of me - overzealous political or religious bloggers, or people who think they are witches. I do not return comments to blogs where someone just commented so I'd visit them back. My goal is not to bump my # of visitors or followers up. My goal is to create an honest exchange, a connection, a friendship - by sharing a little about me, and leaving quality comments with the people I would like to build friendships with.

RE: EMAILING - I do not send out an email reply unless someone hasn't posted something new on their blog for a long while. When their email addy is noreply, then that's that. They receive no reply. When someone sends me an email after I commented over at their blog... when they write an email with something like 'yeah, my blog post rocked and thanks for visiting' - that feels like they are ending the conversation and asking me to go away. So I go away.

RE: COLLECTORS - I don't like collectors and will not play with them.

RE: THE FOLLOWER GADGET - It's on my blog because people requested it. I do not check out who is following me. If they want to follow, that is their choice. If the are following simply to beef up their search engine index positioning - I don't care. It's their reason - their choice. Most of them never leave a comment. Like comments, the # of followers doesn't mean a thing.

RE: GROUPS/CLIQUES - I run away as fast as I can.

RE: THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM: I follow some big blogs or artsy blogs because I simply like them and I could care less if they follow me or leave a comment. How big do they have to get? I don't know and I don't care. If they share content that I enjoy - if they are kind - I will continue to visit.

These are things we all think about as bloggers & misconceptions can occur. As I've said (written) before, I love your honesty, and I appreciate your ability to just jump in and talk about it all! Thank you!

Charlene said...

Suzan I just did this HUGE LONG AMEN SISTER comment & gave you sooooooooo many cuddo's for sayin it how it is & when I hit post comment I got an error message! Grrrrrrrrrrr so here's a waterd down version...THANK YOU for this post it's just what so many need to be reminded of. I Blog WHEN I want for ME! And if someone else likes it... GREAT I LOVE THAT but, you hit the nail on the head! I am so glad I found you & thank you for commenting on my post about the linens & pillows at Pandoras'. Little did you know you were in the KNOW about the pillow in front. It gives support to your neck & shoulders so they can relax. Thanks again for the clarity post. HUGS!

oldgreymare said...

AMEN other Z

See? this is the point I keep trying to get put across albeit I tried a gentler approach. haha I wish I had the nerve to write just what you did here, and I received several others similar via email. Things people think are just silly and yet they continue to cause such misery to so many bloggers.

I still do try to respond to every comment by commenting back (if I have something to say) or email. I DESPISE no reply comment and you notice I've hinted twice this week to bloggers who do not have their emails in profiles.

as to the rules- You did not read the blogging for bliss super popular book outlining the do's and don'ts? Freaked me out. There is no way I felt I could "compete" and that was the key...COMPETE....I hated that.

I was hoping that my writing about this would alleviate some of the worry so many gals have and prevent them from giving up their blogs because they felt they are just not "good enough."

ZUZU you are terrific, and bold and brave and hopefully many will see this in my comment section but I would love to see it on a post of yours some day also. You may reach so many more than I can.

I want the madness to stop. I'm afraid the competitive crap prevents some talented gals from venturing into this realm and unique voices may not be heard. The best thing about this world is this right here, the sharing, the conversations, the ideas..It should not have arbitrary rules slapped on it. I fell under the cloud for a brief spell last year and then came up for air. Some are still trapped.

Thank you so much for this, sincerely thank you. If you make just one blogger throw off her fears and find her joy, well yeah you!

the other z

Sandi said...

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU...couldn't have said it better myself.

Sandi said...

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU...couldn't have said it better myself.

kluless said...

Wonderful post!! I think followers and comments are high on the priority list when you first start out because you are wondering if anyone is reading and you are trying to connect with people. As time goes by it can become a habit, even when you know people are reading you and you have connected with some like-minded folks. Some people probably have issues with being competitive or wanting validation (and most of us have at least a little tiny bit of that in us) but often I think it might just be a habit. It is good to be reminded to think about it.

Hope said...

Hi I stumbled upon your blog from another blog and I can happily say that I am going to follow it b/c I like it. I also want to check out some of the blog sites you have marked in my free time. Thanks.

Kit said...

Hey Lady! You rule. You are definitely the voice of reason and you help keep us thinking. Kit

Pooch Purple Reign said...

no agenda...i just really like being here

erin's art and gardens said...

yippie skippie! i just LOVE the thought provoking conversation you have started here z!! whoo hoo and a big amen! yes, the whole comment thing is soooo jr. high. i am guilty of paying too much attention to it at times. i blog as a creative outlet, and to share my art, gardens and now my new found love of digital photography (a love i wouldn't have found if it weren't for my blog). i am a totally visual person and often don't have anything to say...on my posts or comments or in REAL life. as in my real life...i try to keep things AUTHENTIC and stay true to myself. i consider myself really lucky to have a few followers who i truely admire and would love to meet in person, but just as in my REAL life i don't expect to hear from them all the time! thanks for your openess and this most honest post. i can always count on you for that!! that's why i keep coming back.
love ya,

Dee@FrenchBleuVintage said...

Hi Suzan ~ It feels good to get all that out doesn't it. I wish everyone was more laid back about the whole comment/follower deal. I think this was a great post and certainly worthy of a comment!

Gigi Thibodeau said...

A fantastic post, Suzan! When I first started blogging I was a little hurt when much more established bloggers didn't write back, but I soon understood why. Blogging should be a joy, not a chore. As much as I love comments--and I DO, both giving and receiving--I also love when someone just drops by for a while without leaving a comment. I feel the same way about visiting other blogs. Sometimes I just want to enjoy a post without adding my two cents' at the end. I went through a brief period last fall when I tried to respond to everyone who commented or sent emails, and I found I had time for almost nothing else! Never again.

I'm so glad that Carole "introduced" us. You have a wonderful place here. xo Gigi

Tanya said...

THANK YOU for this post, Z! YOU ROCK!!!!! I started my simple little blog as a way for my out of state family (mainly my folks), and friends to keep up with what I had going on in my life - yes, it's simple and mindless dribble, but it makes my folks happy, so that makes me happy. I have remained pretty "blog illiterate", compared to most, and must admit, I like it like that! :-) How do I get rid of the followers counter? I SO like that idea!

ROCK ON, Z girl, rock on!

beth said...

can i just say....you totally cracked me up with this post....thanks !

Char said...

hear, hear....and you have inspired me to remove mine.

yes, i've seen the collectors and have in the pass wondered....why? but i let it go and got back to why i started blogging which was for me to have an outlet, that anyone reads is a blessing and if anyone follows, it's an honor.

i appreciate gigi for introducing me to you.

Simply Mel {Reverie} said...

Lovely post ~ and so 'right on' when it comes to blogging! Who cares about numbers, it's quality that matters to me. As the old adage goes: Quality over quantity!

Here's to blogging for enjoyment and friendships!

Anonymous said...

I love your straight forward honesty, it's very refreshing. Have a great weekend!


Jules said...

Gigi sent me over bless her.
I started my blog as another way to keep in touch with children too far away and to let them know what was going on in our lives then...then I realised that as I am not getting younger a blog was a nice way for my Grand children to know me when....!
To my extreme surprise i suddenly had followers and of those followers, you are right, about 8 are people I really hope I get to meet in person one day as we have really become friends.
I loathe the terribly,terribly nice comments, particularly when I know I have said something not so nice!
I wish the comments could be conversations between those who comment and if someone wants to disagree with me I am fine with that.
You really wanted to hear all this from a total stranger didn't you hahaha!
I thoroughly enjoyed your post I wish I knew how to follow on reader
but I promise I will be back and there is no need to come visit or reply (though I do love to meet new people!)
And yes I hate noreply!!

Mise said...

I'm also here via Gigi, just to say "Well said!" Blogging is such a competitive merrygoround, and yet within it is such real and valuable camaraderie.

Evi said...

Suzan, I am sitting here, chuckling and nodding my head, as I am reading this post and all the others I missed in between.
Now you know, that I am new to blogland, but heard right away, you should do this and that etc. It somewhat scared me. I love blogging, more then I ever thought, but I also feel like you about so many things. I am happy that I have people who enjoy my blog, enjoy my creations {and sometimes buy them), but the main thing for me is to share and see how other woman live, create and just cope with everyday things.
Thank you for this wonderful post,
PS, I seem to be the kind of blogger, always catching up with blogs.....but loving the blogs I follow.
Met some truly wonderful woman through blogging!!!!!!!!!

Auntie sezzzzzz... said...

So here I am... Late to the party. But better late than never. :-)

You rock! Love the way you and Zuzu [A Cottage In The Woods] have blogged about this issue. I feel it is so needed... An open discussion, of a scary but often secret issue. -sigh-

I admit to having been *guilty* of many of the aspects of blogging stupidity. [Well, they now feel to me, like blogging stupidity.] And I have been *guilty* of making good plans, and falling back into old ways [Ugh]. It's always my hope that I'll finally get it all figured out.

That I'll once & for all, stop my blogging worries and relax. Without the recurring *guilt*. Without the recurring self pressure to check, check, check on stats. Without trying to please any one else but myself, when I blog.

Well, I do want to still write my entries in a comfortable-to-read font size and on a comfortable-to-read background color, etc.

But..... After the ammenities, which I have asked for feedback on, many times, I want to only blog for me. Selfish as that may sound.

I'm not one who is into feeling *guilty* or *selfish* anymore, but wow do those feelings seem to be able to pester me, in my Blog Land Life. Silly, hu?

Again, thank you!!!

Gentle hugs...

Deb said...

at first I was all into how many followers I had...how many comments..how many visitors...now I just enjoy doing my posts..reading the comments I get...and enjoy visiting the blogs I enjoy...I no longer feel obligated to follow blogs that don't interest me...or I have nothing in common with...I leave comments on posts I enjoy or have something to say..if I don't have any thing to say I just don't....you have a nice post here

Relyn Lawson said...

Gigi sent me over and I have to tell you that I love this. Love it! I didn't add the follower section to my blog for over a year. In fact, I finally did it because I kept getting asked to. Funny, because not long after I was frustrated with myself for feeling "all Junior High" about it. I think I am finally past that, but now you make me ponder. (Which I love, by the way.) Should I remove it all together? Hmmmmm....

Anonymous said...

Here from Aunt Amelia's...
Susan, I agree with you. I don't count followers, though it makes me feel good when I get new ones. I initially blogged every day, but I do have to live my life and take care of my responsibilities too.
I have made a lot of friends blogging, and am glad to meet new ones, but if they are your friends, they understand that you can't comment on every post, cover every site every single day.
Love blogging, but there has to be a balance, as in everything else.

Colleen - the AmAzINg Mrs. B said...

Love your attitude..and I agree. So, with that said...I'll be seeing you..sometimes quietly and sometimes, when I feel I have something to add, I'll be talking to you. But I WILL be having fun..and hope that you are as well :-)

My Grama's Soul said...

Helo there....I just found you over at Aunt Amelia's....I have to tell you I LOVED THIS POST.......you have really figured it out......blog because you love to be creative and give something to this world of ours....not to see how many followers you can acquire or how many comments you have.

You will be seeing more of me....I REALLY LOVED THIS!!!!!



Jenny said...

I blogged for a very long time with hardly any commenters. I still only have a few and they are cherished. I know I have lots more readers than commenters, so I don't let any of it bother me. I only read and comment if I can be sincere and thoughtful. That's the same thing I'd want from anyone reading my blog. I work hard at providing high-quality content for anyone who wants to take the time to read. I do it for myself mostly, but also because I think blogging is a pretty great thing. I hope it's here to stay. I love my bloggy buddies.

oldgreymare said...

There are several of you that have no email in your profiles or on your site so I was unable to thank you personally for your comments. I do appreciate very much that you stopped by and took the time to add your wisdom to the discussion.

so...thank you, I hope you see this and please consider adding your email to your profile. : D


kitchu said...

YEP: "I love to discover new blogs and follow them with NO agenda."

Bee said...

I saw this link on one of Gigi's posts and it piqued my curiousity. After three years of blogging, this is the place that I have arrived at, too. I used to answer every comment, and I just can't do it anymore. I do miss my small, intimate circle from earliest blogging days, but blogging, at its best, is about expansion. Not expansion in numbers, necessarily; but a willingness to always be open to some new idea or person as it/she/he presents itself -- often just serendipitously.

Susanne said...

Somehow I missed this until now, great post! I don't know how you have time to answer as many comments as you get, I have a hard time keeping up with the few I get. This blogging is so much fun, it just takes soooo much time. I'd love to follow more blogs, probably have a hundred bookmarked to go back and visit when I have time, but I can't keep up with my dashboard list as it is. I'm having fun trying though.

Your last comment cracked me up, I have a friend who would say what matters is girth, ha!

Romeo said...

Case in point. I'm here. Late. Having not found time in the past three weeks due to all kinds of reality checks. And feeling less than a whole for having missed posting and reading and visiting. Less of a cat, less of a blogger. Less. And I see your post on grey shoes and think maybe I'll just read Z's post and feel better. And "she" laughs to herself and the silliness of the whole shoe and cereal thing and what is really important. Something that has been knawing away at both of us for the past few days...although I thought purrhaps my issue was an errant flea or two. And realizing that what I was feeling was exactly the type of thing you are/did address. And I went out to ZuZu's post and saw the kindness needed to regain the "balance". And to be honest, it is a struggle but your post is something solid that I can hold onto and hopefully pull myself (and "her") back up to. Because I know in my heart that it really shouldn't be such an obligation or risk of guilt or especially a competition. Life is too short to forget what's really important. Thank you Z for reminding us - that's "her" and me, one small cat.

Vicki Boster said...

I am a blogger who is always striving to learn. Carole from Maynard Greenhouse directed me to this post. I so appreciate your thoughts and I have learned some things already from my visit here. I have a very nice following to my blog - (I am blessed) - but I am NOT a counter. More important to me is that I just want to please people who read my blog. You have really helped me to put things in perspective with this fabulous post.

I try very hard to vist those who visit me - but I cannot always do it - life happens - and while I love my blog - I also have a very busy life.

My pet peeve is also the "no Reply blogger" status - and just today - I found out that I was one of those! I had no idea until Carole told me and then helped me to change my blogger profile! I have so so much to learn~~~

Thanks for your thoughts and insight!


Anne said...

This was great for me to read. I've had a business related website for years and its mostly to give people info, so I never got into the comments/followers thing. But I just started a design blog for fun, and its so true, I find myself constantly checking in for new followers and comments -- there are SO many talented people out there, that I wonder if its even worth trying to put in my two cents, but since i'm just doing it for fun, its worth the try. Your words have reminded me to take it lightly... (p.s. I loved the clothing analogy... when I went to high school, you had to wear Villager to be popular!!)

Karen said...

Wow. I'm new to blogging and had no idea this type of thing was going on. I believe you have given me some good training! Thanks. I won't fuss over numbers. My true goal is to chat to whoever is interested, and one day plan workshops in my favorite campgrounds, having my talented friends teach classes. I look at blogging as an opportunity to make additional friends with similar interests, and to look at ideas from different perspectives.
Keep on keeping on!

GramsragsSubsosessi said...

Suzan(great name - my daughter is Suzanne!) I found your site through the fabulouse article in Country Sampler this month - my fav is your awesome craft room - I would die for your organized surroundings - my sewing room is very tiny but is my 'haven' I lose track of all time there, sewing prim raggedy's & quilts as gifts and of course just for me! Luv your trio of angels - are they paper mache'? The colours of your fabrics & surroundings are my hearts' choice as well. Love the teddy bear touch in your room - I used to make mohair bears but arthritic hands now. Your Xmas display Enchanting!! love the little trees peeking out of drawers. Also luv Johnny Depp (haha) I am a retired grandma of 4 and luv decoratung our small condo in prim. Luv your site!!

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful post. I just started following your charming blog a few weeks ago but I really do enjoy coming by and getting to know you better. And, it really doesn't matter to me if you reply back or not. I just like your "vibe" :-) Be blessed.

Avonandmark4you.ecrater.com said...

I stumbled upon your blog from pinterest, and I must say, I love your blog and enjoy your posts. You make a great point and I am glad you addressed it in such a poignant and sophisticated way. You are a joy to read and I love your home. Someday I hope my home looks as lovely as yours. This post is a good no make that great philosophy to follow. I will be back to read more.

Diana said...

Hello Suzan! GREAT post! When I began blogging back in 1998 (on the first of the three blogs I've had over the years), there were no "followers" or "stat" widgets, but I never would have used one anyway, and still don't; I also don't use a stat counter. I find those things annoying. Either you read my blog or you don't. I never started blogging for the readers/followers... I started for myself and still only blog for myself. If someone happens to come across my blog and comment, hey wonderful, thank you for visiting my tiny piece of the world. I also have not/will never put my email out there. I visit a lot of blogs, leave comments, and never hear a thing from those folks; it matters not if they reciprocate. But anyway, I just found you, have read several of your posts, and now you are on my list of fave blogs! Have a happy and blessed day!