Tuesday, July 2, 2013

FRIED

Fried Brains
Fried Blogger
Fried Eggs

Still working with my air conditioning company
on the repair of my attic truss they cut through
while installing new unit.
uh huh yep - of course.... 
Meanwhile fancy thermostat decided to 
channel Frankenstein's monster and
spring to life,

"It's ALIVE"

 as for two days
it has had the ability to raise itself 
to higher temperatures
all by itself.

Frustrating yes, but the real 
pain in the tuckus is that this thermostat
talks. Yep, weird male voice that announces
any action it performs. 
Soooo no matter the time of day,
or night in this case,
you'll hear...
"81"
"82"
..."95"

It is 3 am and I am awakened
by Howie freaking out downstairs.
Howie is growling and running in circles and this
male voice is counting up
"93"
"94"
"95"
I nearly fall rushing down the stairs
half asleep hearing male voices.
So it's true like in scary movies.
Women DO run down to the 
pitch black basement or
open the closet door to look behind...
( Not really, I knew it was the thermostat)

I discover Justice lying right at the base
under the swing gate at foot of the stairs.
To those who don't remember Justice is deaf.
The gate is to protect her from
falling up and down the stairs 
as she is also 90%  blind.

So I gently tap her on the head
 and she startles and slams up into the gate
from underneath and RIPS all four screws 
out of the wall, causing the gate to 
crash down behind her. 
She is terrified
but unhurt.
Howie views this
all as some attack from within  
and promptly runs to chew
 the side of the Ballard Design $$$
 burlap tablecloth he munches on 
when in distress.
HOWIE!!!!! NO!!!!

It is too damn hot for this....
hot enough to fry an egg,
well, you know


and if you don't here is a link on how to do it.
Seriously?
A link?
NUMEROUS LINKS

GET LIVES people!!!


Some mornings the world tilts off sideways 
pretty early for me.
Blogger keeps sending me pink alert messages
that have nothing to do with anything I am doing.
ALERT- this space cannot be left blank
Huh?

118
117
116
115
Our red hot numbers this week.
Death Valley I heard hit 129.
People were driving there to have their
photos taken in front of a big thermometer.
Again..
Really people?
Risk your health and perhaps
blow up your car for a photo op?
Some people have fried brains.

Fried eggs
Fried Blogger
Fried Brains


True Blood and Falling Skies
are back 
Newsroom is close..
coming back right before my signpost B-day.
I watch very little TV
so this is momentous.




As for me?
I have a working air conditioner.
Lots of iced tea
and eggs.

I'm good.





19 comments:

Low Tide High Style said...

Holy crap, they cut through your trusses?! Sheesh, and I thought finding good tile people was impossible. Stay cool my friend, and rest assured, I would NOT be driving towards the heat...only toward cooling sea breezes! Glad the pups are ok, mine freak out at my daughter's ring tones...sigh!

xo Kat

Kathy said...

I know how you dislike the summer heat so glad to hear your sense of humor is alive and well! A talking thermostat. Good golly, who thought the world needed THAT.

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Oh the talking thermostat is enough to make me cry! Good Luck with it all!

Jill said...

You need to move north!! Sheesh that is just disgustingly hot! And, which signpost birthday will this be and when???

Tracey Broome said...

Ugh, you got the heat, we got the rain! Wasn't it the other way around last year? Can't remember, it was too hot to think! I know I would rather have the rain, but it's getting to be a bit much, all of it.....

Tracey Broome said...

oh, and I have one for your bucket, heading over there now!

amy of four corners design said...

ok...I laughed out loud...not so much at your unfortunate chain of events...but rather that this scenario would approximate something that would occur at our house! and I agree - why are people going to Death Valley - really - its hot - stay home!
hope you are surviving...not so hot here in the Pacific NW...but to hear people complain about it you'd think it was hell...

Blondie's Journal said...

I would say, "When it rains, it pours", but that's clearly not the case here. Stay cool and keep up that great sense of humor.

XO,
Jane

Robin Larkspur said...

What a fiasco in the middle of the night for you and the doggies!! I think you better de-voice that thermostat before you go really crazy.

Lana said...

Your sense of humor carries on!! Love on your doggie-babies, eat some ice cream, and keep it cool, woman!! Go Z!! :)

*and tell that freakin' thermostat man to shut the h... up!!

Lana said...

...also...
LOVE the Newsroom! Can't wait!! and should we be wishing you a wonderful birthday "how-close-to-right-before-the-fourteenth"??? :)) Great minds want to know!!

Boxwood Cottage said...

Oh dear Z you really crack me up with your stories (talking man voice thermometer lol), although I know of course that it's not all so funny in real life. I love your sense of humor! Oh well I'd swap some of our cold air with some of your hot air for a really good temp mixture if only I could!
My oh my what crazy hot temps you have there, it's hard to grasp from here.
Stay cool!
xoxo~ C.

Marcela para Colorin Colorado said...

Humor: that's will take us far and you, my friend, have tons of that!!!!

Kathleen said...

Our new thermostat is programmed the same way. It gave me a heart attack. I know there was a way to turn it off I just can't remember how. I'm sure of you google it you'll find the answer. Oh that heat! I lived in Florida for several years. Don't know how people can stand it. It seems you either love it or hate....I'm the latter.

Karen said...


OOh, that voice would kinda drive me nutz. Certainly my dogs...lol...

Stay cool! Can't believe your temps out there!!.. ugh...

Sonja of Hickety Pickety said...

It's only 89 here right now ...it's like a cold front compared to what you're having there...

Hot weather makes me want to drink...I'd be an alcoholic for sure living there.

Take Care Dear Friend!

Beatnheart said...

too damn hot for any human...
love your humourous posts...
your one funny chick.

Kit said...

LOL! I am glad I am in cool Oregon. No heat for me. Can't take it. :) Kit

beth said...

sorry i just laughed a bit at all of this....especially the talking thermostat.

wow, you have had heat and other problems which i hope are all under control now....maybe ????

xo