Monday, October 19, 2020

SO HERE'S THE THING




We are all so weary of this damn year, it's worries, troubles,

 loss and sadness. I was getting lost in it all.

I had to make some tough life decisions, financial and otherwise,

while still mourning the loss of dear Howie.

I start and end each day with a prayer of gratitude that 

my little family is safe and well for another day.

Many are not permitted that privilege, so I really

do acknowledge that blessing in my life.

I've come to accept my illness, my distance from the kids, 

which I had hoped to change, (not to be) and welcomed

sweet weird Walter into my heart.

I had to swallow my pride and accept help, boy, that was tough.

I am trying to focus on small pleasures,

by planting herbs, watching Walter's antics,

and then there are the "what a wonderful world moments."

I've been tweaking the porches and late one night,

 I heard what sounded like a drone approaching.

I stepped out to look at the dark sky

just as the sound clarified into extremely loud honking. 

Just then hundreds of Canada Geese 

in V formation flew low, over my head.

 I could only make out their outlines and

white underbellies in the pitch black sky.

The sounds blasted the air.

 I was squealing with delight,

then clamped my hand over my mouth 

as it was around midnight. I no  

sooner saw the last one disappear, 

when a second larger group flew over to my left.

The tears started flowing as I was ever so grateful to 

be alive, to be a witness, and to see the hope in the spectacle.

I went back onto the porch and then wait, what?

They had done a u turn and flew back over,

 the way that they had come.

It took me hours to not feel the buzz,

the exhilaration, again the hope, I so desperately needed.


Two days later my friend Sue returned some borrowed items,

and brought me goodies (what a baker she is).

Walter is still not socialized to other humans or animals due 

to COVID so he was very scared.

Sue, who does not own animals, patiently tried, and tried again,

while we visited out back, and he would get close,

then run whining and barking.

She knew how I've been worried about this.

I was watching like a parent concerned and 

embarrassed for their child.

90 minutes 

She tried for 90 minutes, with such kindness.

Then he came to her, licked her hands and placed his paws

on her knees, while she scratched his ears.

I started weeping.

He then was obsessed with her and cuddled and wriggled and

it was so damn glorious.

We all need to be brave and fight the good fight

for decency, equality and dignity. 

BUT

we also have to find the goodness, the kindness

the joy that is happening in wee small moments.

If you haven't watched The Way I See It with Pete Sousa.

Please find it and watch.

Remember those THINGS we hold dear, are being destroyed.

Z

Oh and if you are interested I am videoing nearly my entire home

and putting it on Instagram 

here




5 comments:

Kit said...

Oh how wonderful!! You are so right. I had a bad day recently. So depressed. I took a drive to Blue Mountain but first a stop at my fav french fry place. One of my Willard H.S. kids works there and was so excited to see me and gave me my meal for free! I was thrilled and pulled up the street and just cried. It gave me hope. Like your geese. Do you know I have always believed when you see a v of geese, that everything will be alright. Love, Kit

TheCrankyCrow said...

Ahhhh....such a beautifully heart-touching post Z....I could almost feel your joy and gratitude. I know, like many, I have been finding it harder and harder to find joy in each day....but then, sometimes, the geese come through. Love, love, love the Walter story too.....what an amazing friend you have there! ~Robin~

Prims By The Water said...

Yes it is hard to find oy this year, however your geese story reminded me of the year I saw about a hundred swans in our marsh heading North for Spring. What a glorious sight that was too. So glad you pup warmed up to your friend. Janice

Salty Pumpkin Studio said...

Beautiful post. The geese were there when you needed them, and you to witness their beauty. Walter is adorable, with a personality plus.
Is that your store online for grey mare primitives?

Debby said...

This is a hard time for the world really. Like you, I have discovered that when things get 'too big' I need to take a deep breath and focus on the details. Look for the little joys. They are always there, but sometimes we are so focused on the big things that we forget to look for them. Thank you for the reminder.